Seeing what God sees...not what we see

Have you ever been in a situation where it seems hard to gain a Godly perspective on something? You know, like someone being sick and not recovering the way everyone hoped and prayed for, or even thought about? I'm not one to let that get to me too much, but being in that situation can be incredibly draining. That is where we are right now--we all know the Lord is at work, that He has the absolute, immediate ability to heal dad's body and yet, we just aren't seeing the recovery we continue to pray for. Thankfully, that doesn't mean we lose hope though. The word of God says, "'For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope...'" (Jeremiah 29:11)...and we rest in that knowledge, but that doesn't mean handling all of this is easy.

As I've been thinking about this the past few days, I pulled out a CD from one of my all-time favorite musicals (I know, I'm making some confessions that some of you had no idea about...I love musicals), Man of La Mancha. I was first introduced to this musical at a high school church camp at Abilene Christian University right before my junior year in high school (22 years ago!), where we we shown the movie version (not as good as the stage version) and encouraged to begin to look at things from a different perspective, namely a Godly perspective. Now for those of you who don't know the story, the Man of La Mancha, or Don Quixote, has a unique perspective on things. Rather than seeing things as they are, he sees them, well, differently. Now some of the things he sees differently are just strange--like the windmill that he goes to battle with as a mistaken enemy, or the shaving bowl carried by the traveling barber that he sees as the "golden helmet of Mambrino"...but it is the people that he sees in a different light that makes him so special. Rather than seeing the town, um, prostitute, as everyone else sees her, he sees her as Dulcinea, the virgin maiden that he has been waiting for and that he treats with the utmost respect. As a result, most people begin to think he is crazy. Some of you are now asking, "what does this musical have to do with Maria's dad? Is he fighting windmills or picking up golden shaving buckets?" Obviously, the answer to those questions is no, he isn't.

The reality is that, at times, it seems a bit crazy to hold on to the sometimes unseen reality that God is still in control though! So what does that mean for us? It means that although medical professionals don't have all the answers, we know who does. It means that while we wait for dad's body to be healed, we rest in the knowledge that God sees dad's body already healed--whether here or in heaven, he will be healed. I'm not saying all of this to imply that dad is on death's doorstep because he isn't, but there are a lot of unknowns right now that makes this very difficult--especially for those of you who know Maria and me. We don't do so well with the unknown and yet, the Lord continues to allow us to go through "uncharted" waters. I don't mean that in a "woe is me" kind of way either...I hope it means that the Lord has found us faithful in previous uncharted territories (just to fill you in, we've experienced infertility, an ectopic pregnancy, and a 3 week NICU stay with Mclaine--all uncharted territory before those experiences!), but I also know we still have a lot to learn about maintaining faith, no matter what our circumstances.

So our prayer now is for dad's body to be healed, completely...and that we would cry out, just as the father did in Mark 9 when he came to Jesus and asked if He could free his son from the spirit that has seized him. Jesus replies, "If you can? All things are possible to him who believes." You may know the rest of the story, but for those of you who don't, the father then cries out, "I do believe; help my unbelief!"...and that is our cry, too. Lord, we do believe that dad's body can be healed...even when we don't see that happening the way we want...help my unbelief!

Thank you to all who are praying for dad's recovery, for mom, and for all of us as we walk through this--please keep it up! Heaven knows we couldn't make it without the support of so many fellow believers.

Tabletop Truth placemats

For those of you who don't live in the Bryan/College Station area (and those who do, but don't know yet), our friends, Sara and Lisa, have created some amazing placemats. Their business is called Tabletop Truths and they have a wide variety of placemats that you can use to teach your children Biblical truth.

Our boys favorite one so far (we've used 3 different ones) has been the Armor of God placemats. If you want to see that one and more, just go to their blog at http://tabletoptruths.blogspot.com and you can see all of the different ones they have and can order from there. We have our boys on video telling us about the Armor of God as they learned it from the placemats, but I'll have to post that another time. Go order these placemats--they are wonderful!

The things kids say...

So for all of you parents and non-parents alike , I'm just going to say it--parenting is not for the faint of heart! At the same time, just when you think you might lose what little bit of your mind is left, your kids do something to make you laugh, smile, or thank the Lord that you have them. Here are some examples from our family lately:

A few weeks ago, the five of us were at a restaurant and Maria and I were using our standard "code" to communicate about food we had brought for the boys to have after they ate their dinner. This code is well developed and hasn't been cracked for at least 2 years (the same amount of time we've been using it). Instead of the standard "spelling words out" code, we had to resort to spelling things backwards because Maxwell started figuring out what we were spelling. Now the backwards spelling has served us well, but on this particular evening, we had something for the boys and proceeded to "talk" about it. Maria said to me, "do we want to give them the 'y-n-n-u-b'?" Maxwell looked at us and spelled it back to us, "what are 'y-n-n-u-b'?" All we said was, "it is ynnub" as though that were actually a word. A few minutes past before Maxwell looked at us, with excitement in his eyes and voice, and exclaimed, "Bunny fruit snacks, that's what you have for us!" If you have any suggestions for a new code for kids who can read, and spell both forward and backward, feel free to leave a comment!

Last week, Maxwell and Miller went to spend a few days with my parents. One of the things they love about going to Nana and Grandad's is that Nana always has bubble bath for them. The last time the boys went to stay with them though, Nana sent some bubble bath home with them, but it wasn't the sensitive skin version that we have to use on Miller (otherwise, he gets horrible eczema, etc.). So this time around, Miller told Nana that he wanted to take a bubble bath at her house, but that couldn't use the pink bubble bath, "because I have skin." Every time they tell this story now, Miller knows it is funny and just starts laughing.

One other endearing thing we have heard from Miller this Christmas season - we have a "Little People Nativity Set" that the kids can play with (I mentioned it in the previous post), but instead of calling it a "Nativity" set, Miller always calls it a "Wu-tivity" set. We love it!

Hopefully, you are able to laugh and smile with your kids...even when it seems almost impossible to survive the day to day grind of raising kids!

Gloria, in excelsis Deo!

Despite my inability to live in the moment most of the time, when I look back over the Christmas season this year, I am so thankful for many things. We are obviously mindful of the blessing it is to have 3 healthy children at home. After Mclaine's arrival and stay in the NICU, we were reminded that life is fleeting, though thankfully we have the gift of eternal life through Jesus, and that we should treasure this time in our lives. Although not comparable, when I read the Christmas story from the book of Luke this morning, Luke 2:19 took on special meaning for me, "But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart." Some of the wonderful things I've been pondering this season include:

• Family Advent and worship time - the boys really got into Advent this year and back in October we also started having family worship time each evening, so every night Miller would ask, "...are we gonna have family worship time tonight?" They also both love to sing, and it was wonderful to hear them each evening sing out on Christmas carols like, "Angels We Have Heard on High" (the boys' favorite), "Joy to the World", "Away in a Manger", and "Silent Night". I have some separate video clips of them singing and I'll try to upload those when I can (obviously after Christmas).
• Christmas Eve service - we love our church and the Christmas Eve service has become a tradition in our home since we try to stay home for Christmas Day each year. The worship is amazing and the message each year is always spot on without being the same Christmas sermon you've heard before. Going back to the boys and their singing--I got a little teary-eyed last night when I looked at my two oldest boys and watched them worship the Lord at Christmas. If that doesn't make your Christmas, nothing will!
• Jesus' birth - so can I confess, that I've always felt weird singing "Happy Birthday" to Jesus? I mean, I know that we celebrate His birth at Christmas, but taking something so common, like the happy birthday song, has always been awkward for me. Having said that, this year was completely different because of the way Maxwell and Miller responded to the birth of Jesus. Several times a day, I would see them playing with our Little People Nativity set. Then today, we wrapped up the baby Jesus from the set and another baby Jesus that Miller made at a playgroup this month, and as we read Luke 2, we had the boys move Mary and Joseph, the shepherds, and the Wise Men (we also read the account that tells about them) into place, but asked where baby Jesus was. We then had them open their gifts to find baby Jesus waiting to be put in the manger. They were so excited to see baby Jesus...and my thoughts on having a birthday celebration for Jesus are forever changed.

Those are just a few of the highlights of our Christmas. Our prayer is that you are able to celebrate the joy of Christmas now and the gift of eternal life through Jesus forever--Gloria, in excelsis Deo!

Merry Christmas!

Matt, Maria, Maxwell, Miller & Mclaine

A brother's love

I know I promised to keep everyone updated on our family through our blog after the whole ordeal with Mclaine in the NICU in Temple, but who knew transitioning to 3 kids at home and working full-time and teaching a graduate class could be so time consuming?! :-) Seriously though, I miss the outlet that writing became for me (and us) while we were in Temple so I'm going to try to do a better job of keeping this blog up to date. So much has happened since we came home so I'll just start with some of the more recent stuff and if I ever get to go back and write about the older stuff I will.

As a parent, one of the things that is so difficult for me is to keep my cool with the kids when they are acting up and the other day Maria was reminding me that we needed to step back and enjoy...not tolerate...but enjoy our kids. I mean, these are the lives we prayed and cried for as we waited on the Lord to grow our family! I honestly can't imagine our lives without them, but on a day-to-day basis, I find that I'm more annoyed by misbehavior and arguing and complaining and being disrespectful and all of the other things that bother me at that moment. In reality though, Maxwell, Miller and Mclaine are the answer to our prayers so while I am complaining about their misbehavior, etc. does the Lord ever look at me and think, "so what was that you were telling your kids about the Scripture that reminds us to do everything without arguing and complaining?!" Or what about stewardship? Am I being a good steward of the gift of children by losing my cool with them for things that may be important, but that don't warrant such a strong response from me? Can I get a witness here?!

So at this point, you are probably wondering what has caused such a change in my approach to blogging. Well, I discovered that part of our journey as the Upton family, is also about our journey as parents, as husband and wife, as friends, as believers in the Lord Jesus Christ and the list goes on. This is where the "update" comes in. After going through this process of realizing how much time I spent frustrated/annoyed and how little time I spent enjoying my children, Maxwell said just about the most wonderful thing you can imagine yesterday.

While driving down the road, Maxwell said, "Mommy, I'm praying for Miller and Mclaine," to which we obviously replied, "That is great Maxwell."

Maxwell: "...you know what I'm praying for them mommy?"

Maria: "What Maxwell?"

Maxwell: "I'm praying they will know Jesus and ask Him into their heart because we all need Jesus."

Now, I don't know about you, but sentimental or not, that has to bring either the biggest smile to your face or a tear to your eye (a happy tear!)...or maybe both depending on whether you are an emotional wreck at the moment. I think I mainly smiled, but I've been known to get misty every once in a while, too. Along with all of the other "things" that go on every day with our kids, I'm keeping this conversation on repeat in my mind as I attempt to do a better job of enjoying my kids.

May you enjoy whatever it is the Lord has given you--expected or unexpected--in this life.

Our God is in Control

I put together the slideshow below of Mclaine's birth and subsequent stay in the NICU and then homecoming last week. The slideshow is set to a song by Steven Curtis Chapman, "Our God is in Control", that really helped Maria and I through the fear, frustration, and faith building time while Mclaine was in the NICU and we were away from Maxwell and Miller. If you have or ever do find yourself in a crisis, our prayer is the words to this song will help you through that time, but more importantly that you turn to the Lord Jesus...He is the only way we made it through.

Our New Arrival...a little delayed

On Tuesday, August 17, we welcomed Mclaine Elliott Upton into the world. He weighed 9 lbs. 7 oz. and was 22 1/2 inches long. Maria had a great delivery, but Mclaine had aspirated meconium in utero and was ultimately flown to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) at Scott & White in Temple, Texas where he spent the last 3 weeks.

If you want to read details of our 3 weeks in the NICU, go to our CaringBridge site at http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/mclaineupton, enter your email address and a password of your choice. Needless to say, this has been a trial of a magnitude we have never experienced before...but as of today (September 8) we are all home together in College Station!

Losing it!

After a few tears, we finally convinced Maxwell that tonight was the night his first tooth needed to come out. We've tried the "you'll get money" route, but that didn't seem to work. We tried the "your big teeth are already coming in (they are--see the picture on the right and you can see his adult tooth already growing in) and if you don't pull this tooth we are going to have to let the dentist pull it" route...that didn't work either. We tried getting him to eat raw carrots, an apple, anything to help loosen that tooth (actually both of his bottom two teeth in the middle)--all to no avail. Tonight though, it was just hanging on by a little bit and after trying 2-3 times, I finally got it to come out. It wasn't that it was hard to pull it, but when you have a 6 year old wrapping both hands around your wrists and pulling them away every time you even touch his teeth, it does increase the difficulty factor!

He quickly got over the tears though...until we both thought that I had dropped his tooth down the drain. I quickly stopped the water in the sink, thinking that I could take the pipe below apart to try to find the tooth if necessary. Thankfully though, it had landed on the bathroom counter and was safe.

I am a self-admitted sap, so I'm not going to conceal the fact that I got a little teary eyed at this milestone. It really has nothing to do with losing a tooth though and everything to do with the realization that we only have them for a brief moment in time. I made sure I loved on Maxwell a little longer tonight when I put him down--I know these moments will be gone before we know it.

Water popping and a simple prayer

As we await the arrival of our newest family member, the boys continue to keep us laughing. Yesterday at lunch, out of the blue, Maxwell said, "Mommy, has your water popped?" After we regained our composure, Maria told him that when her water breaks, it will look like someone sprayed her with a water hose. Without hesitation, he got up from his seat beside her and moved to stand by me. It took a few minutes, but we finally convinced him that if her water broke it would not "spray" him...and he finally sat back down beside her.

Miller has been running a fever at night for the last few days and he has a mild rash on his skin so in talking to the pediatric nurse, she told us that if we had the baby while he still has the rash, he can have no contact with the baby. We obviously want him to be able to hold the baby when she/he comes, so we started praying that he would get better. While putting him down for bed last night, when Maria finished praying he asked her if he could pray. She of course said yes and here was his prayer:
"Dear Jesus, help Miller feel better, help Miller's fever go away, help Miller's rash go away...and help bubba not be selfish."

It was all Maria could do not to laugh out loud.

I WILL rejoice!

Our friend Larry (the patriarch of the famous Brown family who the Lord sent to us as friends over 11 years ago) recently sent us an email saying that the meaning of , "This is the day that the Lord has made I will rejoice and be glad in it" had shifted for him from being a statement, to more of a declaration with emphasis on "I WILL rejoice and be glad in it..." as a matter of choice, so to speak. Then a couple of weeks later, Maxwell went to Vacation Bible School at a local church and one song they sang really stood out for us because of what Larry shared with us. Here is a video of Maxwell (and sometimes Miller) singing a song for Mr. Larry--hope this is an encouragement to you Larry--we love you and your family!

NOTE: I realize that this post is a little different than usual as it is specifically written to a friend of ours, but is also part of me documenting our family history through the years.

I read it mommy, I read 'da book!

This story is one that won't be special for everyone, but I just couldn't resist posting it. This one is for our friends, the Browns, whose youngest son is coming to A&M in the fall and will be on the tennis team.

A couple of days ago, Maria was reading books to the boys before bed and realized their fingernails needed to be clipped. While she clipped Miller's fingernails, she gave the book to Maxwell to read and when it was Maxwell's turn, Miller told her he wanted to "read 'da book, too, mommy" so she gave him the book to read.

He then opened the book and "read":
"Jesus, help Daniel play tennis. Amen."

Followed by:
"I read it mommy, I read 'da book!"

Yes, Miller, you did read it...even if it was your own story!

The flood and the rainbow

Last week, we had the unfortunate experience of having the boiler valve on our 50 gallon hot water heater pop off and flood our family and laundry rooms. Keep in mind that my dear, sweet wife is 8 months pregnant (9 months this week--here we come August 10!) and it just so happened that every neighbor was gone at the time so she had to wait for me to drive from campus to our home at 80 mph. Thankfully we have a home warranty since we just moved in and what they don't cover, our homeowner's insurance covers (all of the water damage). After 5 days with fans blowing in our home, they removed the fans and dehumidifier this morning and now we can move forward with getting new carpet, the walls painted, and back into that room (where we spend most of our time together).

A great reminder occurred the same night after the water removal crew finished up and we went to eat dinner. While we were eating we looked out the window and saw the following (thanks to the Weirich family for taking this great picture)

Not one, but two rainbows to remind us that the our heavenly Father is a promise keeper and that He is with us even in the flood!

NOTE: We learned through this process that the boiler valve on most newer hot water heaters is now made out of plastic which, in the opinion of our plumber, is not a smart move. We actually have two hot water heaters, the one that blew is in the garage, but the other one is in the attic. We had the plastic valve on the attic one replaced today for $85--much better than the $1,000 deductible for our insurance! You might want to check your hot water heater out though...unless you want to swim in your house :)

Family pictures

With the addition of another little Upton due in August, we had our sweet friend Erin Cole take some family pictures of the four of us in downtown Bryan. I could include the entire album (yes, they are that good), but rather than crash your computer or mine, I'll just share a few. One of our favorite family pictures is now the profile picture on blogger so I won't include that one again.

Isn't she just beautiful? Where did all the gray hair come from on me though? Oh, I think their names are Maxwell and Miller!

Uh-oh, pedi-go

This one will be short, but we don't want to forget this one! Miller has been verbal for quite some time now and as his speech gets even better, we see that we are "losing" many of the really cute things he says. One that he still says though is his version of "uh-oh, spaghetti-o". Instead he says, "uh-oh, pedi-go".

A few days ago, I was in the room with him, but not actively involved in whatever he was doing and I heard him, after dropping a toy, whisper to himself, "pedi-go". That is one memory I'll be replaying quite a bit, I do believe!

Kid's Day?

This morning for Father's Day my dear wife let me sleep in a little later than normal and when it was time to get up, she and the boys came in bearing gifts and cards. After I opened my two gifts and cards, Maxwell, in all seriousness, looked at me and asked, "Daddy, is there a Kid's Day?!" Nothing gets by kids, does it?! After I quit laughing, we reminded him that every day is a Kid's Day...when we go to the pool, when we go to the movies, when we go to Sea World for vacation...and especially when he has food and clean clothes to wear every day!

The truther movement

In an effort to not put shame on our oldest son, let's just say we've been having quite a few conversations about telling the truth in our home lately. Today we got in the car after church and I had the radio on KSBJ (the local Christian radio station for you non-Houston area folks) and someone was preaching and said something about being a hypocrite.

For those of you who have experience with kids, you know that you never can predict when they are listening and picking up on things. I must admit, I was a little surprised that Maxwell piped up and asked me what a hypocrite was. Here is the conversation that followed:

Matt: "Well, a hypocrite is someone who says one thing and then does another."

Maxwell: "Oh, like if Jackson (a friend of his) said he was going to come to my house and then he went to Blake's (another friend) house instead."

Matt: "Well, sort of...it would be more like if someone said they loved Jesus to you and then turned around and said something bad about Jesus to someone else." (don't judge the correctness of my description here!)

Maxwell: "Oh, so that would be lying, right?"

Matt: "That's right, he would be lying about Jesus and Jesus isn't a liar just like God didn't create you to be a liar."

Maxwell: "That's right, because God is a truther! (pause) Well, God is THE truth!"

Matt: "That's right Maxwell, God is THE truth."

Anyone want to join the truther movement we are starting at our home? :)

P.S. I had a great Father's Day with my family working in the yard and helping a friend out. What a blessed man I am...and I'm so thankful for my father, father-in-law, grandfather, and brothers-in law who are leading their families, too.

The power of the father/son relationship

Anyone who knows me knows that I love being a daddy. My two boys and the baby on the way bring many more smiles to my life than they do tears and fatigue, but I am also guilty of not recognizing just how powerful the father/son relationship is (and I'm sure father/daughter relationship, but I don't have one of those...yet). After you watch the video below I think you will be reminded and challenged to remember just like I was.

All Pro Dad Soldier Surprises His Son

I hope the video below not only makes you thank our heavenly Father for the men and women who protect us daily through the military (and other wonderful service careers), but also for the love He showed us in reaching down from heaven, through His Son, to give us life. Oh, the power of the Father/son relationship...I'm glad I get to experience this, too.

Excuses, excuses

I know, I know...not many updates lately, but I promise I have a good excuse...or several good excuses. You see, we moved to a new house a few weeks ago, my wonderful wife who is also 7 months pregnant somehow caught a stomach virus 2 weeks later, we went to Dallas for Memorial Day weekend, had a graduation party for the youngest son of some of our dearest friends the weekend after that and have been trying to finish unpacking, too.

Enough excuses though...we are starting to settle in and we love our new neighborhood. We even have trees in our backyard (we only had a single crepe myrtle in our old backyard) and regularly see hear birds and see butterflies flying around. We have plenty of room for visitors so feel free to stop by if you live in town or just happen to be in Aggieland sometime. Hope to see you soon!

When they make us LOL

Over the course of the past few days, the boys have been full of funny things to say. Now we recognize that they may not seem funny to anyone else, but since this blog is intended as an "update" and a record of memories, we want to record them before we forget them. The only downside I can see is that you don't get to hear or see the boys say these things.

MAXWELL

The other day we were driving down the road and out of the blue Maxwell said, "Daddy, I think I have a sweet tooth coming in!" After we were able to quit laughing, Maria asked him, "why do you say that?" to which he replied, "...because I like sweet things."

MILLER

Last night while getting Miller ready for bed he told me he wanted me to read him one of the Froggy books (one of the books in a series Maxwell has). When I told him we weren't going to read a Froggy book he looked at me with lips pouting and said, "I'mo tell mommy!" (no that isn't a typo--he adds the "o" to the end of I'm instead of saying "going to"). We then went into his room where Maria and Maxwell were waiting for our go to bed routine and he looked at Maria with his best pout (see the previous post from Maxwell's first t-ball game and you can see the look) and said, "Mommy, daddy tell Miller he no wead booky Fwog" (instead of Froggy book).

Tonight at Chick-fil-A was kids eat free and "Build-your-own-Sundae" night and they gave kids free ice cream to make a sundae with. When Miller had just about finished his sundae he looked at me and told me he wanted to play in the play area. When I told him no, he said, "play just a fewww minutes daddy." When I insisted that we were not going to play he stuck his lips out further than we have ever seen and gave me his best pouty look. We were in tears we were laughing so hard and then he just kept looking at us and saying, "why-you laughing?" with his hands out and his shoulders raised in confusion.

Maxwell's sporting debut

Tonight was Maxwell's first t-ball game and he did a FANTASTIC job! He hit the ball twice and both times he scored. He also had a couple of stops when they were fielding the ball. We couldn't be more proud of how well he played!

...and what post wouldn't be complete without a pouting picture of Miller. This was after we told him for the hundredth time that he wasn't big enough to play t-ball yet. He's ready!